Bali Holiday
Experience Outside!, The Travel No Comments »okay! i miss my blogs.. so i decide to put some scratches on it so all of us who read this are blessed with a little sufferings.
BALI.
they don’t call this place ‘the island of the gods’ for nothing. there are indeed a lot of gods they worship there (i just make it up, i dont know a damn about their religion lol). but surely Hinduism practices are prevalent throughout the island.
I don’t like Bali. *heyyy stop throwing me tomatoesss* yaix, are those rotten?? did u prepare rotten tomatoes beforehand?????? *wipe away tomatoes
okay. one. they can’t drive. *stopp hitting meeeee
two. .crowdeeedd. you can’t get around Kuta easily without cursing somebody
three… i hate it most because it makes me want to go back there again!
but i DO LOVE their policemen. unlike big cities’ policemen (jakarta or medan), who have hunter eyes for every minuscule traffic transgression, bali’s policemen are soooooooo tame, it made me want to pat them on the head and pinch them in the face, bring them home and give them food.
no, seriously. we grow tired of greedy policemen so ubiquitous in big cities that all they actually want is bribe. policemen in bali is simply helpful and friendly. they even do gardening (this i spotted on our way to north side of the island through Bedugul route). how cute. and my friend drove without license five days straight and got away with it.
with four (or five?) days at our hands, we still havnt got to visit every nook and cranny of bali yet, thanks to good planning and good road knowledge of our friends (*cough*sarcasm*cough*)
i trusted the travel plan to a friend, who on our previous travel to Phuket had shown great schedule management. but he disappointed us for H-1 preparation, which by the way went into complete chaos anyway.
plusss, we’ve got a balinese (or he tried to claim himself every other time) to drive us, who ironically didnt even ever hear of some of the places on the list or how to get there. on such occasion he would retract his claim to be Balinese. He’s wonosobian by birth, bali-immigrant afterwards. (and he’s incomprehensibly proud of that.. *peace darl lol). (honestly, if u come to Siantar and ask me to drive u around, i’d be lost too. but we were not in Siantar, so i used all the opportunity to humiliate him to the max. *evil*)
but that’s actually what made the trip more interesting. we could mock each other. lol. and we managed to reach interesting places after all, thanks to Garmin. (no, it’s not a girl. it’s a GPS software)
So here’s the summary of what we’ve done:
- we learned how to distinguish the spelling of bitch and beach (or so we thought. we agreed if someone says BEEECH with angry tone, then he means bitch. simple right. LOL)
- we made stupid poses… (okay okay, “I” made stupid poses), so stupid that when my friend clicked on those photos in front of his parents, he gasped loudly, went panic and almost stumbled out of his chair and got a heart attack. *I got rumor his parents forbade him to befriend me afterwards unless i repented, got myself re-baptized, and meditated 40 days and nights without foods *lebay
- i was the most famous visitor in my friend’s home, as his father asked inquiringly who brought a big suitcase for such simple holiday and he remembered with ‘ooh, the guy that likes to go shirtless around the house..’ AWWWW! his father liked me! LOL. (and in my defense, the suitcase came with half full and went back with over full content! …..wait… is that a defense at all?)
- being flirted by a cute gay waiter in the pancake diner. LOL. too bad when we (read: I) got the courage to ask for his phone number the next day, he was sadly not on morning shift..
- also in the diner: we stared at a pretty sexy asian chick, unaware that his boyfriend was sitting across from us, glaring at us. there were 4 men in our group, but he was heavily muscled. so we fleed. *before we put more damage to his ugly face.. (damn, he’s actually cute) *yea right
- went to waterbom and being childish all over (and I went home with super sore buttocks, thanks to little butt meat i had, which bumped against the water when i slid down the highest steepest waterslide). This was the first time my soft lens got out, and i put it back after rinsing it only with tap water. *DON’T do this at home, this is strictly allowed for professional wearer LOL.
OH and i didn’t tell anybody this, but a male westerner deliberately flashed his Wiener (PG-17: cock) to me in the changing room. Why else would he change his underwear outside the changing room right in front of me and meanwhile try to to catch my eyes?? I looked at it anyway. LOL. he had a piercing on his cock which was intriguing. I would have asked him to let me examine that if only T had not come in a little too soon! wakakka. crazy
- we managed to blend in with Balinese! They like to sit on stairs in front of malls and call that hangout. We simulated that by buying Starbucks and sat on a stair facing the Kuta. It’s kinda nice though
- we scared a Arabian couple away after i tried to take a fake shot of the woman with SLR camera since she wore a funny balloon tiara. Fortunately he didnt come to me and stab me… i would have used the nipple pinching skill i got after i visited Nusa Dua water blow… *yeaaa baby
- got our car stuck halfway of an uphill winding road, with a car right behind, and our heart began to pound 168 beats per minute (scarily close to death heartbeat rate, i guess). After this incident, i believe each of us began to confess his sin in silent in hope that their sins would be lifted and make the load lighter. lol
- Two of us learned that brain memorizing power goes disproportionately with age. How else do you explain when one of them tweeted “Dreamland” beach as “DayDream” beach and the other called “Waterblow” as “Deathblow”? ohhhh we are so DEAD in the DREAM.
okay, i’ve written enough. it’s never fun to reveal too many secrets.
My closing statement: i enjoyed Bali because there were friends. Anywhere else wouldn’t have mattered. So this is dedicated to those friends, although i’m not sure this blog is worth dedicating. ![]()


